Down 'Boys!

Oh HAIL yes.

I don't care that we're still 2 games under .500 right now; all that matters is the taste of those sweet, sweet Cowboy tears.  I will say that Romo's injury makes them a bit salty for my liking--never want to see a guy get seriously hurt, no matter how much it might help a team I'm pulling for.  And I do hope Romo is perfectly okay, because I don't want to hear any excuses when Dallas ends up 8-8 and gets trampled by a 'skins team streaking toward the playoffs!

Ahem.  Right.  Let's pump the brakes a little here.  Long, long... long way to go for that.  However, things are definitely looking up, and there's potential for a nice little stretch here with Vikings, Bye, and Tampa Bay on the upcoming slate.

Now, before we get to the bullet-list/rundown (gundown?) below, we have to tackle what is almost certainly foremost in every 'skins-fan's mind (even though we should be thinking about how awesome-tastic Breeland looked, not to mention the beast of a game Meriweather threw together).

That's right.  The QB position.

What to do?  Well, if it's just about the team, it's easy: play Colt until Griffin is ready.  Like I said last week, not a controversy.  But now that McCoy has engineered a win over Dallas (he's undefeated as a 'skin, by the way), it doesn't seem that simple.

What if Colt keeps winning?  What if Griffin isn't 100%?  What if Griffin looks impotent again--do we go back to McCoy?

We're getting ahead of ourselves, but I'll wager the coaches have thought about all this and more.  And they've probably come up with the same solutions I'm about to mention (among others).  The way I see it, the following three options seem "cleanest."

1) Start RG3 right away against the Vikings (so long as he's acceptably healthy).
If the guy is ready to play, I'm on board with this for a number of reasons.  Like it or not, fan/media opinions will have their effects, positive and negative, and right now Colt is riding high.  Before he potentially shoots into the stratosphere by feasting on 2 weak teams, let your franchise guy swoop in and vulture those wins (we can only hope they're wins), re-ingratiating himself with the DC fans (and perhaps the team as well, if locker-room divisions exist).

On the other hand...

2)Ride Colt until the horseshoes come off.
As noted earlier, McCoy is undefeated.  Playing the hot hand here is tricky, even if we're still in nothing-to-lose territory.  It only seems fair to let Colt notch a loss before he gets the hook, but the late-season schedule complicates things.  Also, Gruden has said RG3 is the starter when healthy, and you don't want to go against your word (especially not as a new coach who is just starting to get traction).  If going this route, it will be important to convince Griffin (and Danny Boy Snyder) that the franchise QB's best interests are being served.  A bit more time to heal and strengthen certainly can't hurt Bobby G at this point, whether it's knees, ankles, or some hyper-fragile mutant joint most humans don't even have.

Aside from all this, we have McCoy.  Colt has shown more moxie and composure in 1.5 games than our other QBs combined.  The NoFunLeague is not a the-kid-deserves-a-shot type of enterprise, but still... if he gets 2-8 more starts, he'll have earned them.  Regardless, the happy medium feels more likely.

3) Start Griffin against the Bucs coming off the Bye (again, if acceptably healthy).
Now, I do think Colt will get the nod against the Vikes, and I also think the 'skins get another tough win.  If Colt plays well, that makes the decision a bit harder for Gruden and Co., but the schedule here is critical.  You hate to switch QBs when one is essentially 3-0, but if the 'skins win against TB with McCoy under center, the situation only gets murkier.  Say he's 4-0 going into the 49er game.  Tough time to toss Griffin into the lineup cold.  Better for Colt to start that one (and maybe lose) if he's still doing well.

But say he wins.  Now everyone in DC is pretty happy, right?  And we're over .500.  Are you really going to yank a (currently undefeated) guy named Colt right before you go to Indianapolis?  And do you really want Griffin squaring off against Luck in his first game back?  Maybe you do--that D suddenly looked very suspect against the Steelers--but to me, this game is plastered in bad juju if it's RG3's comeback.

Anyway, you see where I'm going with this.  If McCoy's the starter going to Indy and plays well, I don't see how you pull him after that without making a lot of noise.  The remaining slate is Rams, @NYG, Philly, and Dallas.  Say we're 6-6 with a close loss to Indy.  I think we've waited too long to pull Colt unless he lost the Colts game for us.  And I mean really shit the stable, especially with playoffs on the table (though winning out with Griffin could spin him as the hero of this fable).

Long term, the converse is worse--RG3 takes the 'skins budding playoff chances and stomps them out with his cleats. Sure, it's up to him and the team to produce wins whenever he plays, and if he wins out, he'll be celebrated.  But if Colt's 5-1 or so, and you pull him and thrust Griffin into 4 must-win games... just seems like it's setting Bobby up to fail.  He'd absolutely have to engineer at least a split in those games to avoid alienating the fans in that situation.

The layers of this decision--the fans, RG3's future, temporary team success, locker room solidarity, etc.--make it tougher than it should be.  In short, if Colt keeps playing and keeps winning, things look bad for Griffin.  The bad gets exacerbated if Griffin plays and loses.  But the other side of the coin is that RG3 is golden if he can latch onto McCoy's little winning streak and keep it going.

Obviously this is all moot if Colt falters against the Vikes.  But regardless of his success, I think starting Bobby G sooner rather than later is the way to go if he's still the 'skins future at QB.  If you lose the fanbase (see: Matt Schaub) things can go downhill fast, and RG has some work to do to get DC back in his pocket.  I'd like to see him get the chance to do it.

That said, you won't hear any rational complaints if Colt takes us to 11-5 (or even 9-7).

Woof.  Enough about QBs.  Lets get to the list.

Good:
- The run game.  Not a blistering showing, but successful.
- The blocking.  Much improved.  Polumbus was inactive.  Coincidence?
- DJax.  Still doing what he does.  Would call his night great, but (perhaps unfairly) we expect this of him.
- Colt McCoy's rush TD.  Way to sell out!
- 3rd and 4th downs. 7-15 overall with the big 4th down play.  Could have been better, but I'll call it good.
- Kerrigan.  Just a muffed fumble-recovery from greatness.  Awesome sack to end the 1st half.

Great:
- Haslett's game-plan (and sticking to the blitz when it worked).  Looked like an extra man came around 60% of the time.  Loved the extra aggression, and it paid dividends.
- Great job by the D allowing the blitz to keep coming.  You have to make a defense pay for blitzing; Dallas didn't.
- Meriweather: 2 sacks, 2 forced fumbles, 1 fumble recovery.  Again! Again!
- Breeland.
- Breeland.
- Did I mention Breeland?
- That strip of Murray in the red zone.  (Breeland)
- Hot damn, now that's how you seal a game.  (Breeland)

Meh:
- A number of Colt's 1st half throws, including the INT and the end-zone miss to an open Roberts.
- Missed opportunities.  Early in the game, when the 'skins got a few fortuitous possessions in Dallas territory, we only came away with 3 points.  Tough to win that way.
- Missed opportunities (again).  Deserves a second mention.  On 2 drives, one in the 2nd and one in the 4th, the 'skins took penalties and sacks that backed them out of field goal range.  Can't afford those.

All right sports fans, that's enough for this week.  Catch you after the Vikings game.  Lots of work to do, but let's get to 4-5.  Go 'skins.

Not in the Cards for Captain Kirk; Colt crosses off the Ts

Ok, I'll be honest.  I didn't write about the 'skins loss to 'zona because I was fed up.  It was just another loss in a winnable game (everything's been winnable except the Thursday Night Debacle, I don't care what you say), and I felt that "done" portion of the season coming on.  You know it well, 'skins fans--that tipping point where you start thinking about next season because this one is boned.

Well, we still might be there, because we'll probably need to win 8 of the next 9 for a crack at the postseason.  But damn if it doesn't feel good to win.

I'm not going to talk about the Cards game other than to say that continued turnovers will tear through a football team from the inside like a virus.  To the 'skins credit, as a team they weren't quite infected yet, but I believe Cousins himself was.

I said before that Kirk (sorry Kirk) was taking his turnovers too hard.  I'm going to bring up Steph Curry again.  Perhaps the best trait in a bonafide sports star is selective memory.  Curry forgets every shot that doesn't go in.  Yeah, he's not the only athlete who does this, but he is the one I like the most.

Anyway, this is not to say a player should discard all his wisdom and just gun it without giving a single particle of shit about what happens.  Knowing limitations and playing within yourself will still save your ham sandwich 19 times out of 20.  But when the pooch does get screwed, take that mistake, learn from it, internalize it, then let it go.  Sure, easier said than done.  Whatever.  The great ones do it.  You want to be great, you learn to forget.

All that is to say--after watching Kirk hang his head today when he floated that INT across the middle--I'm not sure Cousins ever develops that skill.  And I'm sorry for that, as he continues to show flashes of brilliance with some absurdly difficult throws (e.g. Niles Paul completion near the start of the game).

But that's the NFL.  Cousins out.  Colt McCoy in.  RIP, Captain Kirk era.

Now, here's a quick rundown of the good stuff from today:

- We WON!!!!  Holy SHIT!!!*
     *(No one should be this enthused about a single win.  Or about beating a 2-4 squad starting Clipboard Jesus.  But a W is a W.)
- Looks like Jordan Reed should be healthy enough to make an impact soon.  That helps.
- Colt McCoy took great care of the ball and showed a lot of composure.  Not getting shaken when the big DJax throw got called back showed some steel.
- McCoy should also add a more mobile aspect that the QB position has lacked with Cousins.
- Good stuff happened when they threw at DJax downfield.
- Garcon is fast.
- Yes, really, Michael Griffin.  I promise.
- The offense put together a great drive to go kick the game-winning FG.
- The D played well enough, even if the Titans are terrible, allowing an eminently acceptable 17 points and 236 yards.
- Breeland!  Congrats on your 1st pick!  Now get up and run, it's the NFL!
- Niles Paul has played well since his bad-blocking game against Seattle.

All right, now that we've got the warm-fuzzies out of the way, here's the reality check:

- Need a lot more from the run game.  Alfred Morris' effectiveness has taken a noticeable dip more or less since Bob Griffin got carted off.
- Orakpo might be done with another pec tear.  Could be his last showing as a 'skin.  Hate to see him go out like that if so.
- Had a couple nice sacks called back for secondary penalties.  'Skins won the penalty battle today, but still have to button those up.
- There is no QB controversy.  Step off that wagon.  'Skins are now in the position of needing to see what they have in Bobby G, so he will play as soon as he can.
- Again, no controversy.  And I like McCoy.  He's got one of those classic, "successful QB" names, too.  I wanted him to succeed when he came into the league.  Smart guy, mobile, and plays with moxie.  But unfortunately he's not wielding a cannon on his right shoulder, so you won't see too many field stretching throws.  If you have a great D, then yes, I think he could capably pilot the tank to the playoffs.  But that's not Washington.  And we have too much invested in Griffin to let him sit behind McCoy right now.
- Like I said up there, we probably need to win 8 of 9 to extend the season.

All that said, I remember not so long ago that the 'skins were 3-6, staring a lost season in the face, and rattled off 7 straight.  That 3-6 is still in reach.  Easy reach.

So let's take baby steps.  Evil 6-1 Alternate-Reality Cowboys are up next.  Who wouldn't love the story of cast-off Colt McCoy or embattled RG3 leading Washington's band of misfits to victory?

I know I would.  Let's get to 3-5.  Go 'skins.


And now, I have to tack on a special mention for what I just watched--that is, the Human Touchdown Pass known as Peyton Manning.  He's at 510 and counting, living in that surreal state where every subsequent TD pass breaks his own record.  Congrats to him.  I want to see 600.

Speaking of that, the SciFi nerd in me has to admit to wondering what the hell they put in his cereal while he was over getting that stem cell stuff done in Europe to help with his spinal fusion surgery.  The way he's playing now at 38, it's easy enough to envision him slinging it until he's 45.  A terrifying thought for NFL coaches everywhere (except Denver).

For anyone who believes the goofy Passer Rating statistic is an actual measure of excellence, it bears noting this: of Peyton's 42 games since heading to Denver, he's only rated under 100 in 16 of them (and only under 90 in 6).  That's kind of absurd.

Anyway, hats off to Peyton (and, to a lesser degree, the 'skins).  Until next week, folks.  HTTR.

Russell Will-run

Back with another batch of thoughts about the Washington 'skins.  This week's defeat brought to you by the Seattle Seahawks (generally) and Russell Wilson (specifically).

- First off, Russell Wilson just carved the 'skins to pieces in the first half.  It was as dominant a performance as any I've ever seen from a legitimate combo QB.  But what is less obvious about Wilson's success tonight (and elsewhere) is how unrelentingly cerebral it is.  I'm a longtime rider of the Wilson bandwagon (grew up pulling for N.C. State and have continued to do so unfailingly despite some pretty thin years--sound familiar?), but what's becoming increasingly clear is that his level of preparation should draw comparisons to another QB (the one whose preparation often seems cybernetically enhanced).

That's right, I'm talking about Peyton Manning.  Wilson's game is very, very different, but his painstakingly-earned knowledge has given him an eerily similar comfort level.  Only developing a vast familiarity with the playbook and opposing scouting reports(enough so to make the act of playing football entirely second-nature) can lead to plays like the 3rd-down conversion around the 3-minute mark that ultimately doomed the 'skins.  To sum up, watching Wilson play makes me imagine watching Steph Curry play football.  And yes, I went ahead and bulked up Curry to a sufficiently un-injurable level for that trip through the alterverse.

Anyway, here's to Russell "Oh-look-you-think-you've-got-me-caught-10-yards-behind-the-line-of-scrimmage-haha-that's-funny-here-you-go-Marshawn" Wilson, folks.

-As for the 'skins, a loss is a loss.  No, it wasn't devastating, but now they're 1-4.  They'll need 9-2 to sniff the playoffs.  Sorry to drop the hammer, but I have better odds of waking up tomorrow with a 4-book publishing deal.  And I haven't even sent letters out yet.

-My first inclination was to feel pretty good about the game, because the 'skins were competitive, they had a chance late, and the Seahawks are good.  But then I got pissed, because that just reminded me of how easily I accept moral victories as a 'skins fan.  No more.  It was a home loss, and those are always buckets of shit.  But I'll start with some positives anyway:

The good:
     -Cousins showed pluck, especially with the last TD drive.
     -The DJax throws were superstar-caliber.
     -DJax did what he was brought in to do, and did it against the Seahawks.
     -The D tightened up nicely after the 'hawks went up 17-0.
     -Kerrigan, NFL sack leader. (And generally, there were some nice hits on RW)
     -Saw Bob Griffin walking around pretty smoothly.

The bad:
     -D on the first Seahawks drive.  Positively abominable.
     -Orakpo's contain.
     -Riley's injury. (But at least it's just an MCL sprain)
     -Offensive inconsistency: great big plays, but way too many punts.
     -The Field Goal.  When you're down 10 to last year's champs and you're 1-3, don't kick on 4th and 1 in the red zone, you schmucks.  That being said...
     -The run game.  Sorry Mr. A. Mo. Bentley, because I love you.  But it wasn't a good night.  Which leads to...

The ugly:
     -Niles Paul's run blocking.
     -Niles Paul's blocking.
     -Niles Paul's run blocking.
     -Niles Paul's effort while blocking.

Sorry Niles.  It was what it was.

All right.  Enough wallowing.  Let's go to Arizona and pound a Cardinals team still reeling from the relentless assault of a certain 6'5" 230 lb. quarterback's laser-rocket arm.

Until next week, sports fans.
      

Thursday Night Freefall

A few rambling thoughts about last night's disastrous Giants v. Deadskins tilt:

- That's as sharp as I've seen Eli Manning play in a while, and that 1 INT aberration was about a nanosecond from being a 6th TD (1 rushing). I don't even want to discuss Larry Donnell's coverage-shredding. But if this version of the Giants shows up for the rest of the season (and then in the playoffs), we might be seeing another one of those infuriatingly inexplicable Super Bowl victories.

- Poor Captain Kirk. Somewhere between this and his relative brilliance versus the Jaguars and Eagles is where we'll find the real Kirk Cousins, but now we're left wondering if this last performance will leave scars. I haven't witnessed an erosion of confidence that rapid since my last bumbling attempts to pick up women in a bar more than a decade ago. The first INT was arguably as much the receiver's fault as his. But as the 'skins fell deeper and deeper into point-debt, Cousins' comfort level vanished, and stared-down receivers and long, forced passes became the norm. A rattled QB is easy to spot, and KC8 became one in that debacle of a 3rd quarter. That being said, I thought he'd played a fine game up until that point, more or less comparable with his efforts the past 2 weeks. His response to this game will be telling. Unfortunately it's against the Seahawks.

- Riding shotgun with that last point, the team's response to this game will define their season. Injuries have mounted, and the depth is being sorely tested on both sides of the ball. They need this 10-day break. But make no mistake: just as so many 'skins teams before them, they've now begun that familiar, invidious slide toward a precipitous downward spiral. And it barely took 4 weeks.

-They're lucky to be looking ahead to a Monday Night game, but few (if any) opponents would be worse. The only silver lining is that the game is at FedEx against the East Coast, Away Seahawks--likely their most beatable form. Regardless, the game presents a potential bottoming-out moment, where they'll either let themselves be buried or resolve to crawl out of the darkness. And at this point, even another respectable loss has to be considered a step toward Option B.

- On the brighter side, Kerrigan got another sack and currently leads the NFL with 5. Too bad the other 4 came against J'ville. As much as I hate to say it, the 'skins pass rush just isn't getting home fast enough. The talent between Orakpo, Kerrigan, and Hatcher is undeniable, but you'd be hard-pressed to call any one of them elite. The pass rush is the part of the game I loved most when I played, and it's hardly ever as much about sack numbers as it is about disruption. To the front four: good effort so far. But more chaos, please. And hell, get the ball a time or two while you're at it.

-My good friend and former roommate--we'll call him Mr. 9/23--has spent the last 5 years building a tradition of going to the 'skins home game nearest his birthday. Washington is 1-4 in these. I will do my best to convince him to stop this nonsense immediately.

-I'll be masticating on this game well into next week, but I'm done doing it here.

Until next time, sports fans. If there is a next time.



P.S. - If you like reading fiction that's almost as dark and bloody as that football game, check out lastcausatum.blogspot.com.

The Cabin in the Woods - a Brief Review

Just watched The Cabin in the Woods last night.  I meant to see it when it came out, but circumstances conspired against me, so I'm just now getting around to it.  For better or worse, I had some preconceived notions going in, but I wish I could have had a clean viewing.  I do think my expectations affected the experience somewhat.

That being said, the movie is a lot of fun.  Right from the opener with Richard Jenkins and Bradley Whitford, we get a slightly different tone than usual.  How many horror movies lead off with amusing banter amid the tedium of a (somewhat scientific-looking) corporate day-job?  And really, for me, this tonal idiosyncrasy is what defined the movie.

Unfortunately, it also limits the film somewhat, but not tremendously so.  Without spoiling anything (because I wouldn't want to pass on those preconceived notions I mentioned) the movie is excellently written, the cast performs gamely, and the dialogue is sharp and enjoyable throughout.  Classic horror tropes are toyed with, turned about, and molded anew.  This is all great fun, but it's also relatively standard for horror satire.

Where the film almost succeeds masterfully is with genuine horror--actually generating scares.  As with Shaun of the Dead, weaving real fear into the absurdity often proves a struggle, though both films give a noble effort.  I'll also point out that this is where that initial tone and my preconceived notions may have colluded with the movie's mounting silliness to hold me back as a viewer (I can't stop thinking of one particularly drawn out scene where a large number of people are enjoying drinks while another person is horribly beaten in the background--it's hilarious, but not remotely frightening).

In any event, it's an entertaining romp with a few smart twists that serves as an incisive commentary on the genre at large, particularly the more recent convention of introducing a cast full of unlikable characters as fodder for the primary antagonist(s).

It also strikes me as the kind of movie that improves under the microscope of repeat viewings, as you catch more jokes and collect additional Easter Eggs.

This one's a solid twelve pack.

Scale:
1 = A shot.  Get it over with quickly and chase it with something more palatable.
2 = A beer. Standard, everyday movie.  Not unenjoyable, but not enough.
3 = A cocktail.  A taste of the good stuff, but watered down and not quite satisfying.
4 = Six pack.  A good time.  Could have been better, but no complaints.
5 = Bottle of Wine.  Slightly more refined fun.
6 = Bottle of Champagne.  To be savored, but leaves you wanting more.
7 = Twelve pack.  Enough to get you excited.
8 = High-Gravity Six Pack.  Like a Twelve Pack, but more tightly edited.
9 = Case.  Amazing, but often taxing.  Pace yourself and try not to break the seal.
10= Bottle of Liquor.  This one will knock you out.

The Coup d'eBron?

Due to a startling lack of substantive sporting news outside of the domestic violence debacle with Ray Rice* (apologies to baseball, golf, tennis, and others, but my ESPN.com pageviews are down about 400,000% since the NBA playoffs ended), I'm paying far more attention to the NBA trade talks, specifically regarding Kevin Love.  This may or may not have something to do with to a certain former Davidson player being somewhat of a focal point on one of the teams involved.  But I digress.

*Two games?  For shame, NFL.

I'll try to keep this fairly brief, but I couldn't help but write it down after a discussion with one of my co-workers inspired the title of this post.  In a nutshell: what if LeBron is gaming the entire NBA on an entirely different level than we even thought possible?

What are the odds that he's pulling all the strings--that he's already convinced Love to stay in Minnesota next year so he can leave as a free agent without the Cavs giving up anything?  It's a little conspiracy-theorist of me, I admit, but it's terribly amusing.  And I can totally see the author of "The Decision" and Miami's erstwhile Big Three coming up with the seeds for this diabolical plan.

But it doesn't stop there.  You remember that letter Gilbert wrote?  Of course you do.  So what makes you think LeBron forgot about it?

Short answer, he didn't, and it's roiling in his guts like a gallon of spoiled milk (not now, I'm rolling).  So, not only is he going to swindle Minnesota by convincing Love to stay a year and walk, he's also going to swindle Gilbert out of a team.

The potential ouster of Donald Sterling (and/or the potential boycott by Clippers players and coaches) sets exactly the precedent LeBron (fictional, devious LeBron in full Che Guevara regalia) was hoping for.  Now all the pieces are in place for him to plant tape recorders and goad Gilbert into mouthing off in just the wrong way at just the wrong time.

The Warriors are now an afterthought in the Love sweepstakes, despite Klay Thompson being the talking-head-consensus-best trade chip, because Love has already been convinced to play in Cleveland.  And LeBron has Cleveland dangling Wiggins (with no intent to actually give him up) to stall the Twolves out whenever they get close to making another move.  What about the Cavs front office, you ask?  Don't be daft.  This is ALL LeBron.  Right?  Right?!

Just you wait.  The pieces are all in place.  When everything goes down, and LeBron somehow rises as the new majority owner of the Cavaliers (and the first in a long line of super-powerful player-owners), don't say I didn't warn you.

The Coup d'eBron is coming.